" While it's fairly common for a woman to marry an older man, the reverse isn't as much of a social norm. Travis and Leah, who have been married close to 20 years, met while attending the same six-week missions organization training."Telling our story never gets old," Leah says, smiling.
Even some 30-something guys I knew didn't seem ready.
But as I observed how he interacted with people at church and did his job, my fears were alleviated.
I guess it was because I'd heard two or three stories of the woman being seven years older, so I'd sort of decided that was the outer limit of age difference acceptability. (And I would hit 31 a month before his next birthday.) Feeling defeated, I sat at the small wooden table in Starbucks, where I was meeting Kevin for the first time since my startling discovery. In case you're wondering, I married that guy eight months later.
I don't know why this one year made such a difference to me.
They usually hasten to inform me, “All his (her) friends are dating.” My quick answer is: When they’re married, and only with their spouse. Now back in the old days — the early 1980s — you met resistance for such a decision mainly from the children. You can’t wrap a moral bubble around them; they have to deal with life. A recent survey suggested that if a child has a first date between the ages of 11 and 13, he or she has a 90% probability of being sexually active during senior year in high school. Key factors to consider in granting any type of dating freedom are your child’s: • moral maturity • independence of thought • history of conduct in other social settings • strength of will • social judgment • choice of friends • responsibility toward schoolwork • respect for authority.
Seriously, dating age depends upon all kinds of factors, and varies from child to child, even within the same family. Never consider your neighborhood’s “average age” when making your decision. Parents used to expect instinctively to be challenged by their kids, especially in judgments of how fast one should grow up. If you make kids too different, they’ll feel like weirdos who don’t fit in. First date at age 14 leads to a 50% chance; first date at age 16, 20% chance. I figure if I make the list long enough, my kids won’t be eligible to date until they move out.
"Things may be good now, but think 10 years down the road," he says. " Wooten's own father was 17 years older than his mother.
"My dad always loved sports, but he was not physically able to engage with me in sports," he says. If you hit it off because you both love rock climbing, consider if that's something that will be part of your relationship for years to come." 3. Another concern Leah had was whether she could submit to Travis as a spiritual leader.
After spending a few days trying to adjust to the fact that the handsome co-leader of my small group was seven years my junior, I had just realized that he was actually eight years younger!
A question I receive often is, "How did you make the decision to date and marry a younger guy?
Parents may want to watch with their older tweens and teens, since many of the events can serve as a starting point for some important conversations.