Especially at this stage of life, why would you want a relationship that doesn't bring you happiness?
I can think of something far worse than being single, gay and older. Dave Singleton works for AARP Publications and has written two books and numerous columns on dating and relationships.
Maybe you just stopped believing in the kind of naive love that you can only trust when you're young. Embrace your new reality For every 20-something entering the gay dating scene full of wide-eyed wonder, there's a 50-something (or a 60-, 70- or older-something) man back on the market after a relationship ends. Your next romantic partner will benefit from all of that, and from your passions for the life that's in front of you. Give up trying to be perfect, too, especially if that's a code word for "young." Yes, it's important to take care of your body and your health, but no need to obsess.But what about the deeper, more mature love that allows for the wide spectrum of experience and truth? One is learning the rules; the other has "been there, dated that" and wonders, "Now what? Instead of trying to be 25 again, get comfortable in your skin. That way, when someone touches you, they'll really feel you, and not a bundle of self-critical tension.You recognize dysfunction and mismatches faster now than you did when you were younger.But that doesn't mean you should be rigid and inflexible. Chat with a guy who isn't your "type" and stretch your boundaries.Pick your future partner based on their dog preferences, small, scruffy or otherwise.
Pros: Just think of all the cute dog meme sharing that could be yours."Within the gay community, negative stereotypes reinforce the belief that gay relationships are based solely on physical attraction, and that once youth starts to fade, we are unlikely to have any real or lasting relationships," says Rik Isensee, author of Are You Ready? And remember that the most important characteristics — loyalty, humor, intelligence and compassion — are ageless.If you think you're too old for love or you stopped believing that you can find someone to love who'll love you back, think again. Focus on what you've gained — rich experiences, accomplishments, survivor skills and wisdom.Think more about keeping a sparkle in your eyes and less on fighting the fine lines around them. Pick your meet 'n' greet venues wisely Does walking into a gay bar make you feel more out of place than Lady Gaga shopping for clothes at a mall?Yes, it's true that the Olympic-sized pool of dating prospects you swam in years ago seems like a lap lane when you reach your 50s. Get off of the sideline and get involved in your passions and interests.Bette Davis used to say, "Getting older ain't for sissies." Amen!