As I’ve mentioned many times before, our body controls our brains, often leaving our moods dependent on our physical state.
Or watch a room full of guys flinch simultaneously when they see someone get hit in the nuts?
This is a result of mirror-neurons in our brains triggering an empathetic response in us.
Remember what I just said about learning social calibration? Other people aren’t obligated to tell you that you’re being creepy again on message boards and subreddits – demanding that women teach “awkward” guys how not to creep on them, similar to the people who insist on the Socially Awkward Exception.
As with the SAE, the underlying message of this demand is that women’s desire to feel safe and their right to set their own boundaries – or to be approached in the manner they prefer – is not as important as the right for men to get what they want.
Repeat this several times – taking a deep breath, holding it, letting it out.
This breathing exercise will help slow your heart rate down, making you feel less nervous. Simply adjusting your posture, straightening your spine, opening your chest and letting the tension drain out of your body provides an immense and immediate boost to your sense of confidence and keeps you from sending the “I’m nervous” vibe via your body language.Don’t be in a rush to respond; give yourself a moment or two to let your mouth catch up with your brain. If you want to avoid being creepy by accident, then you have to work on your social calibration.You’ll appear more thoughtful, conveying that you’re paying attention to what she’s saying rather than just waiting for your turn to talk. Behavior that may be welcome in the right context – touching, for example – can be creepy under different circumstances.Finally, slow yourself down, physically and mentally.Let your gestures be longer and looser instead of tight and twitchy.But even if it’s just a little, please remember us.